Life Is Change

By G. E. Shuman

It was about four thirty last Sunday afternoon, and Lorna, the kids, and I were in my little gas-sipping car, heading home to Vermont from a visit to central Maine. The weekend had been a busy one. We had headed out Saturday morning to attend the wedding of a good friend, the mother of one of our sons in law, in Livermore Falls Maine. The wedding had been very relaxing and enjoyable. I’m not usually a ‘wedding’ person, so this was nice for me. It was good to see Adam’s mom, as she committed herself to her new husband, and simply allowed her life to take a wonderful new direction. This was only the first of several events of change that Lorna and I soon realized we were a part of on this nice weekend.

Saturday night we had driven to my sister’s home in Waterville, for a great visit with Barb and her husband Art, and my Mom, who is staying with them for the summer. We have stayed in Barb and Art’s home many times, but this visit felt a bit different to me than the others had. You see, their beautiful home is in the process of being sold, and, if all goes as scheduled, will likely be demolished and replaced by a new business before the summer is over. My sister and her husband probably entertained us for the final time at their present home, last weekend. They are strong people, who, I’m sure, will sail through this change with no whining at all, unlike the fits that would take place here, if it were all happening to me.

While we were in Waterville, we discussed with Mom the idea that my much older brother, Steve, (Okay, so he’s only a few years older.) who has lived his entire life in Maine, would probably soon make a big change, and move his family to Florida. Maine winters are becoming just too much for my frail old brother to tolerate. (Sorry, Steve. Just kidding. The fact is, I‘m pretty jealous.) That conversation led to talk of the seasons, and how they also had so quickly changed. Winter is not long past, but fields of white have been replaced by a seeming explosion of green across New England this year. We also discussed my younger sister’s move to a new apartment, and how her life had recently changed. We were visited briefly by my younger brother and his great family, and the changes in his growing kids were quite apparent. We all talked about our son Andrew, his upcoming eighth grade graduation, and the change that high school will be for him. We boasted a bit, or maybe a bit more than a bit, to Mom and my sibs, about Andrew’s towering basketball skills and Emily’s status on the high honor roll. We bragged about the changes we have already witnessed in our wonderful new granddaughter, Ayvah. On Sunday afternoon we visited with Lorna’s Mom and her husband, and noticed other, positive changes in them too.

When my family travels by car, especially when we travel home from such a visit with relatives, Lorna and I tend to spend much of the time discussing what we have just done, where we have just been. We sort of chew over things happening in our loved ones lives, often with long pauses between sentences, as we emotionally digest the many changes we have seen.

And so, we traveled from Waterville, down the highway to Portland, and Portsmouth, and then to Manchester to see Cathy and her family for just an hour or so. We then headed on the two hour trip home to Barre, which gave us even more time to talk. We certainly went over all of the family changes mentioned above, and chatted about how they would affect our lives too. We discussed, after once more filling my little car up with the liquid gold it requires, this great energy turmoil our world seems to be in. We saw gas prices as high as $4.08 along the way. We talked about other changes, including the upcoming presidential election, more about the kids, and college, and our own future plans.

In all of this, my dear wife of thirty five years and I sifted through many of life’s possibilities, certainties, and options. It was Lorna who, somewhere along the way, made the profound observation that life really is all about change. In fact, life IS change, if you think about it. Little Ayvah, just three months old, was already working on her own changes, as she smiled widely for us, for the first time last Sunday.

And suddenly the day itself was changing. The night grew upon us on the long ride home. As the sun set, I began to wonder about our observations of all the changes we had seen, in just two days. The sun continued to abandon this, another day that I could never do over, make better or worse, or share again with those people I love so much. Lorna was right, as she tends to be more often than I give her credit for. Life itself really is change. Call it coincidence or not, that as we were leaving Waterville, we noticed the sign in a local churchyard, advertising the pastor’s upcoming sermon. The sign said: “The only people who like change are wet babies.” To me that is funny, but more profound in its timing for us, than funny.

One of my favorite, anonymous quotes is one I have shared several times over the years. It speaks to life, to missed opportunities, to spiritual decisions, and to our possible reactions to change: “It is not possible to go back and make a brand new beginning. It is possible to start from today, and make a brand new ending.” I really wish I had written that one myself.